I absolutely love this article. http://huff.to/1l7GUHg And I can verify that it is true. It is written by Lindsey Self of the Huffington Post and gives us a pretty complete outline of what it is like to have a relationship with someone who lives with mental illness. And I really do resemble that remark. The best takeaway from this article for me comes from #5 and #6 on her list: "It's manageable....but sometimes they don't feel like fighting it". Oh, how I can relate. Some days I wonder if I'm back in the middle of the depression and I just don't realize it. I feel hopeless. Sometimes I feel numb. And I really don't have the energy to address it. Thankfully, this passes. But it has given me an awareness that mental illness is complex. That is why people debate the concept of recovery. If you have a period where you are struggling, does that mean that you haven't recovered? I've read comments from many people that indicate they don't believe in "recovery" as a concept. And I understand the reason why.
When I think about Maxine, I know that most of her life was a downward spiral in terms of her mental illness. It seemed to get worse over time. Her anger was worse. Her hygiene became non-existent. She had no insight. She was unable to see her problems, so she was unable to work towards a recovery. Eventually, she went through a somewhat peaceful period. But was that recovery? Don't really know. It seemed better. But she was never "normal" again. Whatever normal is. Others with mental illness have insight, but the biochemical issues connected to the disease can hinder finding recovery. I'm aware of individuals who are physically medication resistant. They may not readily find a solution for the symptoms of the disease. In support groups, I run across people all the time who are looking for solutions and not finding them. That will get tiring. Then it contributes to the depression. The reality is that "recovery" isn't usually easy. Or total.
Sometimes we all feel like it is too much and we don't want to fight anymore. How many times have you taken a mental health day from work because everything just seemed too much? Or is that a concept only people with mental illness can relate to? I think that life in general gets overwhelming. When you add the biochemical issues into the mix, mental illness makes it unbearable. The stigma connected to the disease makes it tough to battle those times. When someone tells you to just change your attitude, it is like a slap to your face....painful and condescending. So, how can you be in a relationship with me that is loving and nurturing? It is simple. And it is complex. Just be willing to accept me for who I am at that moment. Understand that I'm not volunteering for this. Be there for me when I need you. And be respectful of my need for space when I need private time. Be a good friend. That is all. How can you relate to this? Let's talk! In sharing comes peace......
When I think about Maxine, I know that most of her life was a downward spiral in terms of her mental illness. It seemed to get worse over time. Her anger was worse. Her hygiene became non-existent. She had no insight. She was unable to see her problems, so she was unable to work towards a recovery. Eventually, she went through a somewhat peaceful period. But was that recovery? Don't really know. It seemed better. But she was never "normal" again. Whatever normal is. Others with mental illness have insight, but the biochemical issues connected to the disease can hinder finding recovery. I'm aware of individuals who are physically medication resistant. They may not readily find a solution for the symptoms of the disease. In support groups, I run across people all the time who are looking for solutions and not finding them. That will get tiring. Then it contributes to the depression. The reality is that "recovery" isn't usually easy. Or total.
Sometimes we all feel like it is too much and we don't want to fight anymore. How many times have you taken a mental health day from work because everything just seemed too much? Or is that a concept only people with mental illness can relate to? I think that life in general gets overwhelming. When you add the biochemical issues into the mix, mental illness makes it unbearable. The stigma connected to the disease makes it tough to battle those times. When someone tells you to just change your attitude, it is like a slap to your face....painful and condescending. So, how can you be in a relationship with me that is loving and nurturing? It is simple. And it is complex. Just be willing to accept me for who I am at that moment. Understand that I'm not volunteering for this. Be there for me when I need you. And be respectful of my need for space when I need private time. Be a good friend. That is all. How can you relate to this? Let's talk! In sharing comes peace......
No comments:
Post a Comment