Monday, April 11, 2016

Impossible? Or "I'm Possible"?............

As the late and great actress Audrey Hepburn said, the word 'impossible' says 'I'm possible'. If you take a different view. Impossible can mean hopelessness. I know how it feels to be hopeless.  I know how it feels to stop trusting in your ability to make positive change.  I know what it feels like to believe that I have to be rescued to escape. And I also know what it feels like to live in what is possible. Sometimes recovery is simply taking the steps to make change even if you don't believe in it. Depression is the enemy.  And recognizing that you can make change...living in possibility...can be survival.

I have a young friend who is working on getting into college.  She is smart and capable.  But she has test anxiety which prevents her from working toward her goals. In encouraging her, I'm asking her to live in what is possible.  To take the steps towards her goal without judging herself.  Nothing is possible when you are judging yourself as somehow flawed and not worthy. It is important for her to recognize that there might be steps that she will need to take to accomplish what she wants. It might be an incremental process that she will need to go through in order to get there. But it can be done.

We are our own worst enemy sometimes. If you had asked me when I was going through the worst of my depression in Orlando, I would have told you that I absolutely couldn't get to Tennessee. And even though I saw nothing but roadblocks, here I am. It definitely wasn't impossible. How did I open my mind to solutions? By being willing. When I stopped saying it couldn't work, it did. Amazing. And I've truly learned from that. When things look hopeless, that is when I need to be open and willing. And eventually I find options. What about you?  Can you relate?

In addition, I had to come to some level of self-acceptance. I had to be able to forgive myself for my failures and weaknesses. Part of the issue in Orlando was that my business wasn't supporting me. I couldn't find a job.  I was falling into a hole. Literally, I had to take responsibility for my part in creating the problems.  And in the next breath, I had to forgive myself.  Or it would have been impossible for me to move forward.

I think that in being willing and open, my friend will find many options.  In recognizing the impact of her test anxiety and forgiving herself for being a fallible human, she will be able to see  possibility.  At that point, she will be able to choose the options that meet her needs.

How can you relate to this discussion? Let's talk, because sharing can help all of us move forward.  Sending much love......

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