The hardest thing for any person to do is to take their own inventory. And as I've continued to learn as I dealt with my work 'crisis', that is the most important thing that I can do. In attempting to work out a solution in my dealings with my co-worker, I became aware that there are things that I need to work on. One is assertiveness. I tend to find it difficult to communicate with someone I'm sure is angry at me. I am usually passive-aggressive. But not honest. And not willing to sit down and discuss. Living with Maxine, I didn't have the option of discussion. And as I've described before, I experienced much out-of-control anger in my interactions with my Mom. So, when faced with anger, I would either lash out at her or hide out. No middle ground. No discussion. You can't discuss with a woman calling an eight year old child a "slut".
Anger, when someone in authority is the angry person, is something I can't seem to deal with. I hate to say this, but this is something that has truly influenced my career. I've had more than a couple of experiences with angry bosses. And I've ended up losing or leaving jobs because of it. So, when I reached out to a therapist to discuss my work situation, I became aware again of how I interact in these situations. And I'm learning that I need to make changes in the way that I approach work relationships. I'm kind of new to this realization, even though it should have been obvious. I need to learn new ways to interact with anger. And I'm kind of grateful that I have the opportunity to do so. At my age, it is awesome that I have the ability to learn new things.
For many of us, there are issues that follow us throughout our lives. We may have relationship issues. We may have problems that show up in jobs. We may have problems interacting with family or friends. If you look back at different experiences in your life and you are able to see patterns, that indicates there is something that you should work on. How do you go about doing that? I suggest talking with someone with some expertise. For me, that was a therapist. Sometimes people use sponsors. Or a life coach. Sometimes people are able to process in support or in therapeutic groups. Wherever you go, the most important goal is to be open. For me that takes a lot of work. For most people, that takes a lot of work.
Here is what I'm learning in this situation. Whatever happens at work, Judy will be going with me. And I need to learn new skills in order to make my experiences better. Do you have a issue or problem that you should work on? Would therapy help you to deal with it? Maybe it is time to ditch the misery and learn new skills. I will continue to share what I learn about myself as it happens. I would love for you to let me know what you are working on. In sharing comes healing.......
Anger, when someone in authority is the angry person, is something I can't seem to deal with. I hate to say this, but this is something that has truly influenced my career. I've had more than a couple of experiences with angry bosses. And I've ended up losing or leaving jobs because of it. So, when I reached out to a therapist to discuss my work situation, I became aware again of how I interact in these situations. And I'm learning that I need to make changes in the way that I approach work relationships. I'm kind of new to this realization, even though it should have been obvious. I need to learn new ways to interact with anger. And I'm kind of grateful that I have the opportunity to do so. At my age, it is awesome that I have the ability to learn new things.
For many of us, there are issues that follow us throughout our lives. We may have relationship issues. We may have problems that show up in jobs. We may have problems interacting with family or friends. If you look back at different experiences in your life and you are able to see patterns, that indicates there is something that you should work on. How do you go about doing that? I suggest talking with someone with some expertise. For me, that was a therapist. Sometimes people use sponsors. Or a life coach. Sometimes people are able to process in support or in therapeutic groups. Wherever you go, the most important goal is to be open. For me that takes a lot of work. For most people, that takes a lot of work.
Here is what I'm learning in this situation. Whatever happens at work, Judy will be going with me. And I need to learn new skills in order to make my experiences better. Do you have a issue or problem that you should work on? Would therapy help you to deal with it? Maybe it is time to ditch the misery and learn new skills. I will continue to share what I learn about myself as it happens. I would love for you to let me know what you are working on. In sharing comes healing.......
No comments:
Post a Comment