So, when you reach a certain age, you are vulnerable to certain things. One of them is scammers who 'reach out' online. They come from other countries. And the goal is to entrap some poor woman (or man) looking for affection and companionship. If they trap you...eventually you will find yourself doing all sorts of things for your love. Including laundering money. If you have an interest (and I hope you do not) look for romance scams on the FBI site. It is interesting reading. Why did I feel a need to mention this? At one point, I was that vulnerable. I consider myself a really savvy woman...and I was drawn into this lie. It was a horrible experience and I won't bore you with the details But I did feel a huge sense of shame once I escaped. And I eventually realized that I'd learned some really valuable lessons from the whole experience. Today, I got a reminder. One of those morons 'reached out' to me online. And I very quickly shut him (her? it?) down. Communication was blocked instantaneously. As soon as I ascertained that is what it was.
First of all, when someone sees me as an older (or mature) woman, it has seemed like an insult. At least in the past. I am 57 years old. As I've noted before, around the age my Dad died. My age is fact. It isn't an insult. That is my age. And I'm lucky to be alive. I have time left to enjoy my life. My Dad didn't. I have a daughter I love. I have a comfortable home. I have a job. I have friends. I have fun. I have joy. I have Tennessee sunshine. I am also not seeing anybody. Which would normally have led to that vulnerability that I just talked about. But for some reason, that is gone. I finally get Judy. I love and respect Judy. And I REFUSE to endanger Judy. For any reason at all.
I see women of many ages focused on relationships. I've been there during much of my life. The scammer was one in a long line of 'relationships' that didn't feel right Or work over the long haul. And I've talked in this blog about my 'new' approach to partnership. It isn't something I need. It doesn't factor into how I define myself. And therefore, I feel more fulfilled than I have in decades. I really can't explain how I got here. I feel like I went through a long tunnel and found sunshine at the other end. But here is my most important point: When you want something so badly that you feel you have to have it to survive, you are vulnerable. You have to be really satisfied with who you are in order to NOT be susceptible to those who will hurt and use you. It takes work. It takes true self-acceptance. And depression doesn't help you get there. I know the truth of that statement. So, your first task, should you choose to accept it, is this: Get help. Feel better. Work on yourself. Dump the shame. Get well. Be strong. JUST DO IT! And don't look for relationships until you are truly there. If you ignore what I am saying, I can tell you what you will find. Hurt, shame, loneliness, and pain. If you need to talk, I am here. And I won't try to scam you. All my love........
First of all, when someone sees me as an older (or mature) woman, it has seemed like an insult. At least in the past. I am 57 years old. As I've noted before, around the age my Dad died. My age is fact. It isn't an insult. That is my age. And I'm lucky to be alive. I have time left to enjoy my life. My Dad didn't. I have a daughter I love. I have a comfortable home. I have a job. I have friends. I have fun. I have joy. I have Tennessee sunshine. I am also not seeing anybody. Which would normally have led to that vulnerability that I just talked about. But for some reason, that is gone. I finally get Judy. I love and respect Judy. And I REFUSE to endanger Judy. For any reason at all.
I see women of many ages focused on relationships. I've been there during much of my life. The scammer was one in a long line of 'relationships' that didn't feel right Or work over the long haul. And I've talked in this blog about my 'new' approach to partnership. It isn't something I need. It doesn't factor into how I define myself. And therefore, I feel more fulfilled than I have in decades. I really can't explain how I got here. I feel like I went through a long tunnel and found sunshine at the other end. But here is my most important point: When you want something so badly that you feel you have to have it to survive, you are vulnerable. You have to be really satisfied with who you are in order to NOT be susceptible to those who will hurt and use you. It takes work. It takes true self-acceptance. And depression doesn't help you get there. I know the truth of that statement. So, your first task, should you choose to accept it, is this: Get help. Feel better. Work on yourself. Dump the shame. Get well. Be strong. JUST DO IT! And don't look for relationships until you are truly there. If you ignore what I am saying, I can tell you what you will find. Hurt, shame, loneliness, and pain. If you need to talk, I am here. And I won't try to scam you. All my love........
No comments:
Post a Comment