Sunday, June 29, 2014

Talking it out......

When I was young, and dealing with the mental illness of Maxine, talking about mental illness was not done.  I have written before about the impact of people watching my Mom's deterioration without commenting on it or reaching out.  Sometimes I tried to reach out, but it never really worked.  No one really knew what to say.  So, I have been fascinated in recent times to discover how many people actually reach out and tak about mental illness.  In blogs, in Internet communities, in face-to-face support groups, and in conversation.  While stigma and silence still exist,  there is more discussion.  Is this a good thing?  Most definitely, yes.  Denying the problem is there doesn't work.  Pretending that the fact of mental illness is about some mysterious other doesn't work.  If one in four human beings has a mental illness, we simply can't hide anymore.  Mental illness touches more of us than we realize.  And it is time we deal with it.

My blog is a reaction to the silence and denial I felt surrounding me as a child.  It is my attempt to say...HERE I AM!  And this is real.  It is my version of coming out of the closet.  In some ways, it has been life-altering.  It allowed me to bring my experience with Maxine back into my heart and soul. To own my history.  And to really begin to move past it.  I hope that is what other people speaking out are able to accomplish.

What I have witnessed in many of these communities in which people talk about mental illness is that they function as a support group.  People share struggles, problem solve, and show support for each other.  It is an awesome thing.  In that kind of setting...you are not alone.  And your concerns will be acknowledged.  People have the opportunity to share problems, fears, and the ups/downs of life.  They talk about recovery tools, and safety planning.  I'm not sure that Maxine would have benefitted from that kind of support.  She had so much denial, most people couldn't find a way in to support her.  But many of the people participating do benefit.  They learn from each other.

Not everybody is able or willing to share with the community in general, like I do.  But wherever people share, they are challenging shame and stigma.  Here is my challenge for you:  Where are you willing to take a risk and share?  If you aren't sure, I am certainly willing to talk over the options with you.  Feel free to contact me about that.  You will never know how good honesty and acceptance can feel until you try.


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