As a social service professional working with those living with mental illness and chemical dependency, I was always fascinated by the clear connection I saw between early abuse experiences and illness. In the variety of programs I worked for, I did countless intakes in which people talked about early experiences with abuse. Many times it was sexual abuse. So, whatever academicians see, I believe totally that the experience of being sexually abused can lead to severe mental health problems in later life. In the last few days, there has been a controversy in the United States concerning a show that has been popular here for many years. It is called "19 Kids and Counting". This show follows an extremely religious family who live a lifestyle connected to an extremely conservative religious Christian movement. They are anti-everything: They don't believe in abortion. They believe that women need to be submissive to men. They are anti-Gay. They don't believe in birth control. I admit, I'm not a fan. I think that they are fundamentalist. I'm not attracted to conservative types of religion. I'm a Reform Jew because of that fact.
However, to my horror, I have found another reason to be uncomfortable with this show. It appears that the oldest son in this family of 19 children was guilty of molesting his sisters and family friends as a teenager. This was covered up and 'handled' through counseling the young man regarding his 'sin'. He was sent to a family friend to do construction work as penance. Law enforcement was brought in long after the fact...with another family friend who swept the whole thing under the rug. As a matter of fact, this officer was later imprisoned after being charged for child pornography. There was no actual counseling. And there was no accountability within the criminal justice system.
Now, the purpose of writing about this situation is not to bash the family. The show has been taken off the air at this point. My goal in writing about this is to point out the following: I believe that victims of sexual abuse require that we take their experiences seriously. Allowing a family member to escape the consequences of their behavior through cover-up doesn't serve the needs of the family members who were the victims. And cover-ups and denial of these kinds of crimes runs rampant through many families. It is time to take it seriously. While the behavior might be 'sinful', true repentance requires experiencing the real consequences of your behavior. Treatment is important. So is a trip through the criminal justice system. Victims need to know they have been heard. Cover-ups are a significant part of the damage done by the abuse.
What do you think? Have you been a victim of sexual abuse? What would be important to you in regards to your abuser? Do you think that our system needs to take abuse situations more seriously? Let's talk!
However, to my horror, I have found another reason to be uncomfortable with this show. It appears that the oldest son in this family of 19 children was guilty of molesting his sisters and family friends as a teenager. This was covered up and 'handled' through counseling the young man regarding his 'sin'. He was sent to a family friend to do construction work as penance. Law enforcement was brought in long after the fact...with another family friend who swept the whole thing under the rug. As a matter of fact, this officer was later imprisoned after being charged for child pornography. There was no actual counseling. And there was no accountability within the criminal justice system.
Now, the purpose of writing about this situation is not to bash the family. The show has been taken off the air at this point. My goal in writing about this is to point out the following: I believe that victims of sexual abuse require that we take their experiences seriously. Allowing a family member to escape the consequences of their behavior through cover-up doesn't serve the needs of the family members who were the victims. And cover-ups and denial of these kinds of crimes runs rampant through many families. It is time to take it seriously. While the behavior might be 'sinful', true repentance requires experiencing the real consequences of your behavior. Treatment is important. So is a trip through the criminal justice system. Victims need to know they have been heard. Cover-ups are a significant part of the damage done by the abuse.
What do you think? Have you been a victim of sexual abuse? What would be important to you in regards to your abuser? Do you think that our system needs to take abuse situations more seriously? Let's talk!
No comments:
Post a Comment