If I hadn't had the experience of knowing the loving Mom underneath the mental illness, my memories of Maxine would be far different. As it is, I remember her sense of humor, her willingness to play with her children, and her love...along with the negatives resulting from her deterioration. Love is found in many places that we don't recognize. Which is why the story that I am going to tell you touches me so much. Ed (not his real name) is developmentally challenged. He is a customer, along with his Mom, at my place of business. He is an adult, with many of the behaviors of a child. Ed comes into our business on a regular basis. He has totally charmed the staff. Including me. He walks around telling us we are " trouble". I suspect he has had that term applied to himself at times. Whether that was serious criticism or not, in Ed's mouth, it is truly loving. He teases us, and enjoys teasing in return.
When Ed comes in, I can't help smiling. Whatever is going on in my life, Ed brings pure joy. He is loving and exuberant. So, when he came in for a visit yesterday, I was prepared to be happy. But Ed gave me a gift that was beyond the usual dose of happy. With a co- worker, he chose a card for me. It was a wonderful card. He thanked ME for touching his life. The man-child that brings joy in the door thanked me. Now, I am sure that his Mom has struggled at times. It must be difficult to be caring for her developmentally challenged man-child. Especially since she is dealing with her own health issues. But look at what Ed is underneath all that. He is simply love personified. And what a beautiful gift he gave me.
So, this beautiful little gift is sitting in a place of honor at my home. As a reminder that EVEN Maxine was a gift. While we are struggling with people and issues in our life, we have to take the pain seriously. The struggle is significant. But remembering the good times and happiness are important too. We can't live life in pain all the time. Seeing the joy is a survival skill. Looking for love makes life worth living. Here is hoping that you end your holiday weekend with all the positive memories that you can handle. Remember the love.
When Ed comes in, I can't help smiling. Whatever is going on in my life, Ed brings pure joy. He is loving and exuberant. So, when he came in for a visit yesterday, I was prepared to be happy. But Ed gave me a gift that was beyond the usual dose of happy. With a co- worker, he chose a card for me. It was a wonderful card. He thanked ME for touching his life. The man-child that brings joy in the door thanked me. Now, I am sure that his Mom has struggled at times. It must be difficult to be caring for her developmentally challenged man-child. Especially since she is dealing with her own health issues. But look at what Ed is underneath all that. He is simply love personified. And what a beautiful gift he gave me.
So, this beautiful little gift is sitting in a place of honor at my home. As a reminder that EVEN Maxine was a gift. While we are struggling with people and issues in our life, we have to take the pain seriously. The struggle is significant. But remembering the good times and happiness are important too. We can't live life in pain all the time. Seeing the joy is a survival skill. Looking for love makes life worth living. Here is hoping that you end your holiday weekend with all the positive memories that you can handle. Remember the love.
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