As I have conducted
business, I have been working on two very interesting accounts. One is a consignment and new clothing shop
serving women. The other one is a beauty
salon. Both have been affirming places
for me. I have been given
clothing…unique clothing…from the clothing shop. And just recently, I had a haircut and color
at the beauty salon. And I remembered
something. Caring for yourself and
feeling beautiful are important to mental health. At least for women. I believe that the same is true for men. When I think of my Mom and her symptoms, that
was one of the first things that I noticed as she got sick. She stopped taking care of herself. And for me, that is always a symptom that
shows up when I am getting depressed in a problematic sense. I stop caring how I look. I am not so quick to take a shower and take
care of myself. Good mental health is
something that you need to work towards.
Especially if you are prone to depression. And being aware of how your appearance
impacts and reflects your moods is the first step.
Now, having read many posts on social media from younger
folks, I realize that much depression and other types of mental illness
(Example: eating disorders) are influenced by the fact that we usually judge
ourselves harshly in terms of our looks.
Many of the youngsters who appear to be posting about mental illness
from a personal perspective are obsessed with looks, in particular with how
they look. Amazingly so. And no matter what I see in their profile
pictures, they are convinced they are ugly.
Or too fat. Or simply not good
enough. This can be both a psychiatric
illness when it is a fixed belief, and a societal trend. We compare ourselves. I compare myself. And if you do the same, you know that you
will never measure up. Someone is always
better than you.
So, here is what I have learned. I am me.
I look like me. I can always do
better at taking care of me and allowing my natural beauty to shine
through. I can eat a healthy diet. I can get exercise. I can keep myself showered and wear
makeup. I can get my hair done regularly
and have a hairstyle that is flattering and appeals to me. I can remember that I am a woman with a good
heart and lots of love to give. That is
really more important than my looks. And
I can remember that how I look should please ME first. And I shouldn’t worry about those that don’t
find me attractive. Personally, I think
I am such an attractive woman on the inside that those who aren’t attracted are
the ones missing out.
But to make me feel attractive on the outside, I do need to
do some basic things. This week my
beauty shop client gave me a much needed makeover for my hair. I had it colored an attractive and fitting
color. It was trimmed and styled. And the style suits my face. My clothing shop client has regularly
provided me with unique clothing and shoes.
Sometimes, what I have been given have not been things I would have chosen
for myself. I love them. And they make me feel attractive. So, I have been reminded what a boost taking
care of myself is. What do you think about that? How does how you look impact your mood?
But underneath it all, here is the most important fact. I have to do these things to please ME. And to express the love of self that keeps me
mentally healthy. Not in a narcissistic
way. Just in a self-nurturing way. Do you nurture yourself? Periodically get your hair done? Find a new and appealing outfit to wear? Or do you forget to do those things? Consider this another tool in the
toolbox. Self-care is important. As is asking yourself why you are punishing
yourself by NOT taking care of yourself.
Finally, I have to learn that I am beautiful. As are ALL human beings. In our own ways. And I have to learn to not compare. I am me.
With all my unique beauty. And
all my flaws. The same applies to
you. Look for your beauty today. And take care of yourself.
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