A woman who read my blog sent me a note about a family member suffering with mental illness who doesn’t take his medicine. She told me that the reason that he doesn’t take it is because of the side-effects. This is truly not surprising to me. As I found when I worked with mentally ill people, they are frequently not cooperative with medication. And one of the reasons that they gave me is that the side-effects are not comfortable. As I read through a National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) publication about this topic, it reminded me about some of the side-effects that I used to hear about from clients. They would say that they “didn’t feel right”. Or that it made them “too groggy” or “tired all the time”. Sometimes, they would even say that they felt better, so they thought they didn’t need it anymore. More typically, they wouldn’t tell me why. They would just stop taking the medicine.
Are you thinking that helping someone with mental illness cope with medication problems and the side-effects is complex? It truly is. But what is the alternative? I guess the alternative would be untreated severe and chronic mental illness. There is evidence that we are dealing with that problem. Many of those who are homeless have some type of mental illness. And they are usually untreated. How has that worked for us? What does work? Does it work to force hospitalization on people? Does it work to increase funding to community based mental health options? Does it work to warehouse people for the long-term? People with much more education and experience than I have struggled with these problems. We have always had difficulty in coming up with a cohesive and reasonable approach to dealing with mental illness. I am certainly not here to give you any answers. What do you think? What is your opinion about the direction we need to take in providing treatment for the mentally ill?
What I can tell you is what my experience leads me to know, which is how it feels to love someone who is mentally ill. It feels overwhelming, frightening and hopeless. The problems are complex and difficult to solve. But I can also tell you that it is worth looking for the solution(s). My Mom was not a throw away person. And neither is the relative of the friend who wrote me. They have worth. They are human. It is not a waste to devote our time and attention. Because, the reality is that at some point, they will die. And then our ability to help them IS gone. Nobody really wants to give up on a loved one who is struggling with mental illness. But being a family member dealing with the mental illness of a loved one is sometimes very lonely. My goal in talking to you about it is to let you know that you AREN’T alone. For support, please Google your local Mental Health Association or NAMI. You may find support groups and other resources that you didn’t know are there.
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