During much of my life, I have come up with reasons I couldn't recover. It is too hard. The problem is my situation. I'm not capable of doing it. I've talked about how my approach and my state of mind contributed to keeping me stuck. And I realized that there was a common thread in all those reasons. I was close-minded. I wasn't willing to listen. I saw no alternatives. I wasn't willing to act. Now I look for reasons why I can recover. I look for ways to feel better. I don't claim my depression as a reason that I can't live life. How come I changed my view? I really did hit my bottom. And I saw the rest of my life playing out in misery. That was enough motivation to look for alternatives.
I'm 58 years old. I am very aware that I have far less life to live than I have already lived. I have health issues. I'm not all that secure financially. And I STILL see reason to work on my recovery. What I do today will impact the quality of life that I have moving forward. Among the physical illnesses that I have accumulated through life, I have a biochemical mental illness. It is called depression. That means that I have a harder time seeing the positive. I really have to work at staying OK. I can fall into the pit at a moment's notice. I really can. I have before. And I know that there is no guarantee that I can maintain my peace and serenity. I know that I can choose self-destructive paths and I probably will. If you leave it to me....I will eventually talk myself into choosing death. So, what has been my solution?
I acknowledge my need to listen to the wisdom of those who know how to recover. I use the tools that help me maintain. I recognize that I can't just talk the talk. I really do have to walk the walk. And that requires the willingness to listen. That requires openness. It requires taking actual action. It means that I have to put in the work. Recovery for me just doesn't happen. I see people rejecting feedback and ideas all the time. Including me. Then I remind myself....if I am so smart, how come I didn't do it at other times? How come I had to reach bottom before I chose to make changes? I guess it is human nature to think we know better. But there really is a reason that 'common wisdom' IS common wisdom. There are things we can do. There are options.
If you find yourself saying "Yes, but..." when someone gives you feedback, you are stuck. Truly. I've said before that finding the nugget that leads to recovery means being open and willing. And I will keep saying it until you tell me that you don't want to listen to me anymore. Sometimes that feedback comes from unexpected places. So, you have to listen. With your entire mind, heart and soul. You have to willingly take action and do things that feel wrong to you. You have to trust that you can be led. You have to willingly open yourself to the experience, strength and hope of other people. Or you will remain stuck. That is a choice. You are a person who has the right to determine your path. If you choose misery, that is what you choose. I hope you don't. If misery is an option...so is recovery. Let's talk! All my love.......
I'm 58 years old. I am very aware that I have far less life to live than I have already lived. I have health issues. I'm not all that secure financially. And I STILL see reason to work on my recovery. What I do today will impact the quality of life that I have moving forward. Among the physical illnesses that I have accumulated through life, I have a biochemical mental illness. It is called depression. That means that I have a harder time seeing the positive. I really have to work at staying OK. I can fall into the pit at a moment's notice. I really can. I have before. And I know that there is no guarantee that I can maintain my peace and serenity. I know that I can choose self-destructive paths and I probably will. If you leave it to me....I will eventually talk myself into choosing death. So, what has been my solution?
I acknowledge my need to listen to the wisdom of those who know how to recover. I use the tools that help me maintain. I recognize that I can't just talk the talk. I really do have to walk the walk. And that requires the willingness to listen. That requires openness. It requires taking actual action. It means that I have to put in the work. Recovery for me just doesn't happen. I see people rejecting feedback and ideas all the time. Including me. Then I remind myself....if I am so smart, how come I didn't do it at other times? How come I had to reach bottom before I chose to make changes? I guess it is human nature to think we know better. But there really is a reason that 'common wisdom' IS common wisdom. There are things we can do. There are options.
If you find yourself saying "Yes, but..." when someone gives you feedback, you are stuck. Truly. I've said before that finding the nugget that leads to recovery means being open and willing. And I will keep saying it until you tell me that you don't want to listen to me anymore. Sometimes that feedback comes from unexpected places. So, you have to listen. With your entire mind, heart and soul. You have to willingly take action and do things that feel wrong to you. You have to trust that you can be led. You have to willingly open yourself to the experience, strength and hope of other people. Or you will remain stuck. That is a choice. You are a person who has the right to determine your path. If you choose misery, that is what you choose. I hope you don't. If misery is an option...so is recovery. Let's talk! All my love.......
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