Denial can be many things. From outright denial that a problem exists to the minizimation of severity. It can also be the conviction that nothing is going to work to help you recover. And finally, denial can be the belief that your choices and attitudes have no impact on your potential for recovery. Denial is frequently part of mental illness. Maxine never admitted she had a problem. In spite of the severity of her illness, she would erupt in anger and abusive curses anytime it was suggested that she might be sick. In my case, even though I knew about medication and other tools, I was pretty much convinced I wasn't capable of feeling better. I thought depression was just the way it was, and I was powerless to make changes.
We may put a unique spin on our mental illnesses, but we have much in common. Our denial seems to follow similar patterns. We are not really all that unique. What brought this to mind? A reader suggested that it might not be easy to be willing if you think you are powerless to solve the problem. My thought was, that is true. And it is true for most of us. The belief that we are unable to change the course of our depression is common to those dealing with depression. Few if us go into treatment believing that things can change and our attitudes can influence the probability of success. But we do go into treatment. We learn to use tools. We may take medicine. We increase our understanding of our dysfunctional thought patterns. And, hopefully, we start noticing small changes. Which lead to bigger changes. And then we are dealing with our illness. Instead of letting our illness control our lives.
What I'm saying is that denial is part of the illness. And to challenge it, we may have to act 'as if' in order to jump start the process. I remember clearly that internally I was convinced I was worthless and would probably not find a job if I moved to Tennessee. My depression and denial were in control. My support system told me I could do it. So when I got to Tennessee, I acted 'as if' and got a job. I was willing to put in the effort despite my belief that I was destined for unemployment and homelessness. Willingness involves taking a leap of faith. Putting trust in the possibility that someone is seeing more clearly than you are. And willingness involves putting one foot in front of the other even when you think you will fall flat on your face.
For my friend....faking it until you make it is an important recovery skill. And it is something that can be learned. When counselors/therapists tell you that you are in control, that may be what they are talking about. Without the willingness to begin that process, it can and will get worse.
What can you relate to in this discussion? Let's talk! Sending much love........
We may put a unique spin on our mental illnesses, but we have much in common. Our denial seems to follow similar patterns. We are not really all that unique. What brought this to mind? A reader suggested that it might not be easy to be willing if you think you are powerless to solve the problem. My thought was, that is true. And it is true for most of us. The belief that we are unable to change the course of our depression is common to those dealing with depression. Few if us go into treatment believing that things can change and our attitudes can influence the probability of success. But we do go into treatment. We learn to use tools. We may take medicine. We increase our understanding of our dysfunctional thought patterns. And, hopefully, we start noticing small changes. Which lead to bigger changes. And then we are dealing with our illness. Instead of letting our illness control our lives.
What I'm saying is that denial is part of the illness. And to challenge it, we may have to act 'as if' in order to jump start the process. I remember clearly that internally I was convinced I was worthless and would probably not find a job if I moved to Tennessee. My depression and denial were in control. My support system told me I could do it. So when I got to Tennessee, I acted 'as if' and got a job. I was willing to put in the effort despite my belief that I was destined for unemployment and homelessness. Willingness involves taking a leap of faith. Putting trust in the possibility that someone is seeing more clearly than you are. And willingness involves putting one foot in front of the other even when you think you will fall flat on your face.
For my friend....faking it until you make it is an important recovery skill. And it is something that can be learned. When counselors/therapists tell you that you are in control, that may be what they are talking about. Without the willingness to begin that process, it can and will get worse.
What can you relate to in this discussion? Let's talk! Sending much love........
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